Talking smack or whatever


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So I was thinking about my sprinkler today

You see, I had this sprinkler. Nothing fancy. It was by some company with some European-type name and it had some european type of design. It used some kind of quick-connect coupler to attach to the garden hose, and any garden-care products from the same company use the same quick-connect coupler. I suppose it’s for those power-gardeners that need to change from sprinkler to nozzle to gutter-cleaner in the blink of an eye.

Anyway, I had left it to drain, on a rock right up against our house. This has to be a good 30 feet back from the curb. I had left it there for days and days – far longer than it needed to drain. The next time I went to use it, it was nowhere to be found.

So of course, I thought that somebody has walked off with my sprinkler. The longer I thought about it, the more upset I got. It’s a sprinkler. It’s not, like, a bike, or something. You know, it’s not worth any money or anything. You can’t use it to make or sell drugs, or really, for anything at all – other than watering your lawn. And on top of it all, they didn’t get the quick-connector (it was in the garage). So the thing is exactly useless…

Unless it was stolen by somebody who already uses other products from the same company!

That must be it! It’s the only thing that makes any sense at all. Somebody who already has the quick-connector was eyeing my too-long-unattended sprinkler for their arsenal of lawn care products, and when the Nth day hit – they pounced. Aha! This MUST be garbage – he hasn’t used it in days!

And now the point of this story…

My point is not, “what is wrong with people that they would steal somebody’s sprinkler?” No, that is far too obvious a question, and really not worth debating on this site. My point is that assuming that somebody did steal my sprinkler to complement their arsenal of lawn-care products from the same company, why didn’t they just ask me for it?

Excuse me, are you throwing your sprinkler away? Because if you are, I’d really like it for my arsenal of lawn-care products.

The reason nobody asked me for it (aside from the more likely scenario that nobody actually took it for their aresenal of lawn-care products from the same company), is that people don’t do that. People don’t engage one another as strangers in amicable discussion.

People are afraid of each other.

We hide behind email and weblogs. (mylridia waves from behind a weblog) We don’t make eye contact or wave or say hello. We hide in our cars, behind frantic single-finger-salutes. When we do engage one another verbally it’s usually littered with swearing, and emphasised with fisticuffs.

Heh. I just remembered a time I was standing in line at the grocery. The line in front of me hadn’t moved, but the grocery conveyor did. So the guy behind me pushed up against me to get me to move up. We don’t need to continue that tangent – I’ve already illustrated my point.

Identify the neighbouring houses in your neighbourhood and enumerate the occupants you are familiar with. How do you know them? By their cars? By face? By the faces of their families? By name? First Name? LAST NAME? Add them up and divide by the number of years you’ve been living where you are. How many neighbours have you met per year?

Whomever took my sprinkler had an opportunity to do it right, and to meet me in the process. But instead all they got was an illegal sprinkler. I hope they don’t try to sell the crack they make from it to my kids…


Written by worlok2112

June 20, 2005 at 5:19 am

Posted in Uncategorized

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